So with all the shenanigans going on this week, I’ve been wondering what it would be like if Hillary and Obama played poker. Apologies to the Clinton folks out there but I come up with good jokes so rarely, I couldn't resist.
Hillary: I bet $50.
Obama: I’ll see your $50 and raise you $25.
Hillary: I’ll see your raise and raise you another $50.
Obama: Call (lays down a full house)
Hillary: (lays down a flush) I’ll raise you another $50.
Obama: I just called your bet and you lost.
Hillary: Don’t push me! How about if I raise you $25?
Obama: OK, I’m just going to take these chips here…
Hillary: THIEF!...That does it! I raise you another $50!
Obama: (gets up and starts to walk out) Hey Michelle, let’s go get some dinner. Let’s go somewhere nice, I just won some money.
Hillary: OK, we’ll split the pot.
Thursday, June 05, 2008
What if Obama and Hillary Played Poker?
Posted by Raised By Republicans at 9:46 AM
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4 comments:
Love the punch line. Still, let this mark the end of Hillary-bashing on this site (not that there's been much at all). Unity unity unity!
What bashing? She had a flush! I'd re-raise with a flush! ;-)
This is a riot. I know it's a bit mean, but I just love that line, "OK, I'm just going to take these chips here." At any rate, humor is healing, right?
I could add another scenario - not as funny, but makes fun of Obama:
Both candidates set down to play primary poker.
Hillary: I bet $50
Obama: I'll see your $50 and raise you $25.
Hillary: I'll see your raise and raise you another $50.
Obama: Call (lays down a Full house)
Hillary: (lays down a flush)
Hillary pays up and they redeal.
Hillary: Ante up.
Obama: Sure, it's only a quarter.
Hillary: Action is to you.
Obama: Fold.
Hillary: Damn. I had good cards. At least you put in the ante.
They deal again.
Both ante.
Hillary: Check
Obama: Fold.
Hillary: Oh come on, At least wait for the flop.
Obama: Um, no.
They deal again. Both ante.
Obama: Fold.
Hillary: I haven't even dealt yet.
Obama: (checks watch) Er, misdeal.
Obama deals only two cards, both to Hillary.
Hillary: What the f--?
Obama: I'm going to fold.
Hillary: hat the hell is wrong with you? You win a big pot and never play again. I'll never win my money back that way! Lousy sport.
Obama: Gee, it's getting late. Michelle, want to get some drinks? I'm the big winner tonight.
Hillary: Baloney! I've had better cards every single hand. All you did was win one lousy pot. (hurls chips at Obama) You couldn't play your way out of a paper bag.
Obama: (packs up his winnings) See ya later, veepinator
Fold.
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