Storm a castle! (but be sure to have fun doing it)
Taunt some Englishmen.
Go to a parade!
Join the Foreign Legion!
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
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| Bell Curve | The Law Talking Guy | Raised by Republicans | U.S. West | ||||||||||
| Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son." | |||||||||||||
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10 comments:
Will do on the wine.
You sure you don't want to taunt me whilst you're at it? ;-p
Your father was a hamster and your mother smelt of elderberries!
And your national anthems are wussy compared to our blood thirsty lyrics, you pansies! (Not to mention that our tune is catchier!)
"Rebellious Scots to crush"?
The alternative Danish national anthem (used for the Royal family now) has the most blood thirsty lyrics though:
Kong Kristian stod ved højen mast i røg og damp;
Hans værge hamrede så fast,
At Gotens hjelm og hjerne brast.
Da sank hver fjendligt spejl og mast i røg und damp.
„Fly," skreg de, „fly, hvad flygte kan!
Hvo står for Danmarks Kristian i kamp?"
TRANSLATION:
King Christian stood by the tall mast in smoke and mist;
his sword was hammering so hard, that the Swedes' helmets and brains cracked.
Then sank every enemy stern and mast in smoke and mist.
"Flee," they screamed, "flee as flee can!
Who can stand up to Denmark's Christian in battle?"
Nahh . . . smashing brains isn't bloddy, just goopy.
US West, you are assuming a certain substantive consistency to Swedish brains.... Maybe they are runny and lacking in firmness?
Pah! I don't believe that you have a grail already. Besides, I've got a coconut. A swallow carried it here, by its husk.
:-)
Here is verse 3 of the US National anthem (note: we never sing past verse one) addressed to the British invaders of 1812:
And where is that band who so vauntingly swore/
That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion/
A home and a country should leave us no more!/
Their blood has washed out their foul footsteps' pollution./
No refuge could save the hireling and slave/
From the terror of flight, or the gloom of the grave/
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave/
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.
Pretty freakin' awesome, if you ask me. Beats the crap out of "America the beautiful" where we just sing about the gorgeous countryside we stole from the Indians.
Heck, here's verse four. You can add self-righteousness too.
O! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand/
Between their loved home and the war's desolation!/
Blest with victory and peace, may the heav'n rescued land/
Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation./
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just/
And this be our motto: 'In God is our trust.'/
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave/
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave
Note, btw, that "In god we trust" which appears on our coins was not adopted as a motto until quite late, but was part of popular parlance ever since 1814 when the lyrics were published - and yes I found this in the original lyrics.
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